Perfect Disaster
by LuckyBachi
Summary: One shot angst stories. Here I will just upload stories that don't flow with chapters.
1. Perfect Disaster

"What did you think?" The male asked, his voice somewhat recognisable as Natsu pulled himself up from the grass, his legs dirty as his torn clothes wore battle rips.

It had been a long fight, and he wasn't sure how it had began. Perhaps half of it had never even happened, he couldn't be sure. But that was the least of his problems, his senses were on high alert and yet he couldn't smell a single thing. In the dark, it was like listening out for a pin too drop on a metal floor. Listening to the breath in the silence.

His head did nothing but ache as he felt a wave of dizziness linger over him, blurring his vision as he tried to steady himself in the grass. It wasn't often he felt so weak, it was as if he had been drained of all magic.

Defenceless as he was left listening to the voice he still yet hadn't figured out.

At first, he thought he recognised the voice, something he had heard when he was younger, perhaps much younger. Like a voice he had heard many times whilst growing up, yet he knew it was not Igneel. And yet, the tone of voice still seemed to make his heart ache, the voice continuing as finally it decided to reveal itself into a light that Natsu had barely even noticed existed. It wasn't who he had thought, nor was it who he hoped.

He had to admit, he was even a little surprised.

It didn't take long for the mysterious male to pull himself out of the darkness, it was like all Natsu's senses were timed, like he could only hear things when it was nessacary not by choice of his own.

There was something so terrifying about the voice when it's owner was confirmed, but the man looked different, something devious and darker about al the other times Natsu had seen him.

"Zeref…" Natsu growled, his eyes glued onto the man that stood over him in an almost glorifying manner.

For some reason, he knew immediately that the reason for the pains in his head was because of Zeref, yet he couldn't explain why.

As he glanced at his bloody knuckles, he knew he had no tangible evidence, but he had a bad feeling. Like it had been hardwired into his brain.

"What the hell are you doing here?" The dragon slayers voice was hoarse as he shuffled, trying to pull himself out of the shadow's like Zeref had done. But it was no use, it's like they were sucking him in and he was beginning to feel sick simply from the lack of light.

He knew for certain that he was in a field, despite not being able to smell a thing, he could feel the blades of grass and the damp mud underneath. Zeref only watched Natsu, his eyes emotionless like Natsu was some kind of artwork, something precious.

But Zeref was not Natsu's friend.

"You truly have impressed me…" Zeref spoke with such eloquence, his tone made Natsu shiver with disgust.

As always, the words made no sense. "I never thought you would grow up with such admirable humanity. Don't worry though, it won't last long."

The dark mage nodded, pulling himself away from the light, pacing. Natsu could hear him crush the blades beneath him, his coat causing a draft and the dragon slayer tried to pull himself up.

Ugh.. it was no use. His head hurt a lot, and it was like there was a drumming loudly in his head, making Zeref's words echo and repeat like a loop recording; ringing in his ears over an over until he spoke of a new sentence, and the same thing would repeat.

"I don't understand…" Natsu grumbled, his voice agitated.

He wasn't in the mood to even sit, let alone hold a one sided conversation. What was he even doing there…

"What did you think?" Zeref repeated his earlier sentence, his curious eyes settling on Natsu. "Did you honestly believe you were going to find your happy ever after? Are you telling me the humans really changed you that much?"

Natsu raised a brow, what in the hell was this jackass on about?

For one, Natsu hadn't spoken a word about happy endings, and as far as his life had gone, it had been anything but.

They were still going after all, problems popping up every few months.

"What are you talking about?!" Natsu scoffed, forcing himself upright, even though he somehow felt like a rag doll, left with no energy to pull himself together.

"Welcome to the real world! You finally embraced who you really are."

The smile Zeref produced looked maniacal on the man, like a child who had just ripped the legs off a spider.

Curious and proud.

Proud of his work.

Natsu only watched the dark mage, digging his glare questioningly.

"What are you trying to state…" The boy's tone was already so agitated, and Zeref's continuing irritating obsession to be vague was grating further on his nerves.

Zeref laughed then, another further concern.

"What, did you think that was your blood coated on your hands?"

Natsu dragged his eyes back to his blood stained hands, a confused look settling on his face. All he could hear was a soft echoing, a reoccurring thump. A heart beat, loud and echoing in his ears.

He turned his head back practically giving himself whiplash with his extremity of speed, his eyes glancing around to see where the sound came from before he clung a hand to her chest in pure despair.

It was if the darkness no longer existed, and what he earlier had though was mud was a mush of red ooze, a blonde girl lying lifelessly across the grass in a pool of her own blood.

He didn't have to force himself to move, he could already see her from where he sat, her skin boiled and burned, her eyes rested shut as she did nothing but continue to bleed, slashes across her skin, her head dripping. This fight… it had been with Lucy?

Even his breathing stuttered now, and he finally found the energy to drag himself to his feet, plonking himself next to his best friend. He barely remembered how he got there, everything had become a blur, even Zeref's next words were slurred.

"You showed no mercy. I was glad you found it easy. It means you won't have a problem with me…"

Natsu didn't care for the dark mage's words, he was too focused on the burnt and bleeding Lucy, his breathing stopping as he held his breath, wanting to touch her, to check if she was okay.

The beating finally halted, pulling to a stop and he knew that it was her heart that he had been hearing. There was nothing else stronger than the heart of Lucy Heartfilia after all.

But even as silenced edged it's way back into Natsu's ears, he felt himself staring blankly at the corpse of his newly late friend.

Had he really done it? Right there and then, he couldn't remember a thing.. had he really just pushed a memory from his mind? Sure enough it was her blood, even without his sense of smell, he knew now that the blood could not belong to anyone else.

"Etherious Natsu Dragneel…" Zeref purred, a soft breathy laugh emitting from his lips.

"You are truly my perfect disaster."


	2. Scars

Lucy was used to her own kinds of research now, even as she sat at the desk, she didn't mind the boys sitting opposite as she tapped away at the live lacrima flip top, scanning her eyes away at archives and databases.

But she'd side tracked herself, the soft warmth of the room distracting as she ended up reading another article about Mirajane in the south from the beginning of the year. She was beginning to know the articles line for line. It was good that they'd found Erza and Gray, but there were still so many of guild misplaced along Magnolia.

How long she had spent, trying to pin them all down one by one?

And now there were five of them in the same building, when this time last year, they'd just all left her alone.

She slammed the lacrima shut with a shrug as her eyes dragged to the other side of the table; Happy lying on his tummy in the middle and Natsu with his head tucked away into the crook of his inner elbow.

This was Natsu, it was a well known fact that this boy could sleep anywhere, she was glad that not a lot about him had changed. He was still the same hyper active dragon slayer, beckoning to fight with anything that moved accompanied with his cheeky smile..

Or at least she hoped as she sat there in silence; watching him.

Even as he lay with his head rested on his arms, he looked relaxed as he moved slightly up and down with the rhythm of his breathing, a gradual snore as he took up his corner of the table.

But there was something she could not take her eyes from; and it was something she had been curious about ever since the pink dragon slayer's well waited return…the bandage wrapped all too tightly around his right arm.

Lucy couldn't shake off the feeling that he was hiding something. After all, Natsu liked to avoid worrying someone, it wasn't of his character to just come out and tell her something that had to do with himself. Naturally, she was worried.

She leaned forward at a moderate pace, dragging her elbows across the wood, she had to be quiet if she didn't want to wake him, his senses were near perfect as she knew all too well.

Though when he slept, it was possible to distract him.

The blonde titled her head, watching him curiously as she held back the urge to move aside a pink lock of hair that settled across the bridge of his nose.

With a shake of the head, she brought her focus back to the bandage, which she was glad to see was the arm he rested on top. It would have been harder if she had to pull his head up some how.

She was even nervous as she hovered her fingers over the tightly woven bandage. It was now or never, she was close enough to just rip it off and risk waking him up. It wasn't like he could hide anything after she saw whatever was underneath. But she didn;t have the heart to wake him. Especially when he looked so peaceful, so all she did was slowly tug at the material in the softest manner she could possibly achieve.

Surprisingly enough, she managed to pull the first strip back, her eyes widening as at first she could no realise what it was, forcing her own breath to keep in pace with Natsu's snore.

For what she saw, she honestly did not expect. At first, she couldn't tell, maybe it could have been the flick of the light. But then she realised there was no way it could be anything else and something inside her began to ache.

Her gut?

Her heart?

Her un-nessacary guilt?

There across the tip of his wrist were scars. Only thin lines, as if done with a very sharp knife of some kind, the silvery lines fading under the bandage, perhaps to reveal more.

She did tug further at the bandage and sure enough they fled horizontally down his wrist. Just small lines, slashes perhaps. Some messy, some looking accidental. There were at least eight that she found so far until she froze up.  
Because she suddenly realised the snoozing had frozen and now she was just sitting in silence with her hands glued anxiously halfway down his bandage.

Lucy didn't need to check, she knew that she had woken the dragon slayer. But she had been so shocked… and not only did sorrow fill her heart, but so did anger just a little bit.

Anger than Natsu was hiding scars on his wrists and with that she pulled back. Hurt and furious that he did not trust her with such a thing. Right now she would need to demand the truth and he would need to give it her otherwise he would be sleeping out on the streets.

Though it was his voice that broke her thoughts, his words a whisper as he still sounded to be half asleep.

"Why did you do that?" Was all he asked, his head still resting in his arms, his question muffled.

"Why did I do that?!" She replied, her tone shaky yet offended too. "What is that?! Why are you hiding it?! Did you do that- to- to yourself?" She'd shuffled closed to him, but she forced herself to keep distance, waiting for him to lift his head.

Just as planned, he did, his expression unreadable as his tired eyes were a soft grey.

Though he pressed his lips together, looking to be contemplating his answer. Before he finally settled on an answer that crushed her a little bit.

"Yes."

She watched him, nervous.

Natsu was sincere, he wore no smile, no soft eyes, his hair the only thing looking calm. But it seemed as though he had been waiting for this conversation to pop up, it was obvious by the way he watched her back.  
Though he finally dropped his glance and pulled the bandage back down to his wrist, as if there were reason to cover it again.

"I thought they'd go." He replied, sitting up properly in the seat, his cold expression concerning. "I guess I'm stuck with scars."

"Why did you cut yourself?" She whispered, trembling.

Why didn't he look sad, guilty, heartbroken?

Like she did?

Did he really no longer care for his wellbeing?

What did he go through in that year?! She had no idea! He was hiding things right under her nose, what else wasn't he telling her?!

She clamped her eyes shut, not wanting to look at his face any more, only listening to the hum of his voice as he answered again.

"I was beginning to grow tired."

"What do you mean…?"

"I was losing track of all the people I was letting down. Trying to protect everyone. But sometimes, people got hurt…"

"What do you mean?"

"…So I made a note, so I would remember how many people I didn't protect. How many people got hurt… It's not a big deal, Luce."

"Y-you cut yourself every time you realised someone got hurt?"

"I left to get stronger, Lucy. I want to protect you all."

"Natsu…"

"This was like a reminder, for me to be more careful. Keep an eye on everyone. They're old." Though she raised a brow, suspicious as he continued. "I got better, barely anyone was getting hurt as I got stronger."

He smiled slightly, and she realised she had opened her eyes once more.

"Every time someone got hurt… you hurt yourself?"

"…"

Her eyes welled up with years, that gut wrenching sadness hurting like a heavy bruise.

She had hoped there had been something less under that bandage, but it seemed to carry it's own burden and that made her yank the boy into a hug as they sat in silence.

"Natsu… You idiot…"


	3. Broken Promises

It wasn't that she didn't trust him anymore, it was just that every now and then, Lucy felt like she had to keep an eye on Natsu; just in case his disappeared again. It wasn't like he broke any promises, but she felt as though one needed to be made.

Just to be certain.

She shook her head, pressing her lips together in a self stubborn manner. She couldn't be thinking of the worst anyway, there was no reason for him to leave now right?

He had left to train... With the strength she had seen from him, it was obvious that he had fulfilled that job and strengthened up all on his own as he had planned. And she didn't blame him, he had no idea about Fairy Tail, and he had even got Gray after promises. Or perhaps that was just it. Lucy had never known Natsu break a promise.. If she could get him to promise, it might confirm him not going.

She grumbled slightly, why was this such a big deal? Everyone had left, wouldn't it make more sense for her to want everyone to promise? And yet, something in her told her that she would only need Natsu to promise.

She flicked her eyes forward, it was late after all, and the boys had already gotten ready to eat. But she had wanted to go out and get food for them, they had both insisted on coming with her, her pace slower than theirs so she was left walking behind them.

Lucy took in a stuttered breath, collecting her thoughts quietly as she tucked a blonde lock of hair behind her ear. It was now or never, and luckily she found it easy to gather her confidence; this was only Natsu of course.

She forced herself to tread forward faster, walking directly between them, cutting the boys off in their conversation about the lack of ramen on their trip.

"Hey Natsu.."

They practically whipped back to look at her, midst in an argument by the expressions on their faces. She really had been in a mind of her own world if she could block out Natsu and Happy shouting at one another in that usual teasing and friendly manner.

They were cross, but something she loved about then was the fact that they were true family, they sometimes would fight or have a heated discussion and yet they were the best of friends and made up in seconds.

She did a sheepish laugh and smiled awkwardly. It probably wasn't the best idea to bring up anything serious, but luckily Natsu was one to quickly adapt so she forced herself to continue with the conversation she had curated.

"I was just... Thinking.. About something..."

He raised a brow gently, "You didn't get much spicy ramen either?"

Though his voice was playful, she couldn't help but feel guilty for spoiling his and Happy's silly talk, and the genuine look he gave her made her stomach grow queasy with butterflies.

"No Natsu... Something serious."

"Hoi. Spicy ramen is serious." He said, shooting a soft glare towards Happy who seemed to sigh in defeat.

"Natsu." Lucy repeated, her voice warming that she wanted to be taken serious. And sure enough, his expression stiffened and he trained his eyes on Lucy; halting them from walking.

"What's wrong? Do you feel sick?"

"No, I just wanted.. To ask you something." She said with sincerity, putting her hands behind her back in a solemn manner, apologetic as she crossed her arms.

"Okay. What is it?" Even Happy had settled on the ground now, his wings growing tired as he stood on the pavement impatiently.

"Well.. I just... You left me. Alone... For a year."

His face screwed up at that, like it always did when she brought up the subject. And sure enough he would fall silent now she had brought it up, so she had the advantage of having room to talk.

"Ah Luce.."

"I don't want to talk about it. I want to ask my question."

He looked oddly taken aback but nodded out of relief and curiosity.

"Will you leave again?"

"What?"

"Will you leave again?"

"N-no? I don't think so."

"Promise me." She said quietly, tempted to cling to his scarf out of sheer embarrassment.

But her statement was true.

She didn't want him to leave her again.

He stepped forward and admittedly, she was a little shocked by the action.

"I promise…"

Her eyes widened, she was hopeful after all.

Natsu's face was right inline with hers now, his dark eyes focused on hers.

"I promise that I will never hurt you. Ever again."

Her expression faltered slightly. Not only had he avoided answering properly, he had also avoided making a promise. Which meant he obviously knew he would break it.

And that was just it, Natsu didn't make promises he couldn't hoped it meant the same thing.

After all, if he left again… she would be heart broken… perhaps even right now she felt a little so. And that would hurt her more than anything.


	4. Gone Forever

**_(Sorry readers, this one was a little messy, I put it together quite quickly so I could post in time)_**

_Natsu didn't remember opening his eyes, barely remembered standing either. _  
_But at times like these, you couldn't feel a thing other than a fluttery feeling as everything looked so real; leaving one to question whether such a memory was legit or not. _

_It was quiet. Dark. Sometimes when you fell asleep, you can feel it. Your head gets heavy in a way that all your thoughts fade away._

_One emotion was true though, and that was shock. _

_His eyes were suddenly wide and worried as the nervous feeling grew into an ache, and it was only as he stepped forward and heard the ripple of liquid did he realise finally where he was._

_No… _

_But it was true as he glanced down at what he wore, his scarf dirty around his neck and his tattered black clothes that he had taken from the enemy. It had been a while after all._

_It couldn't be… it happened almost over a year ago now… yet it was still fresh in his mind as he stared at the bloody corpse ahead of him._

_And suddenly like a wave, he felt his emotions rush over him all in one go._  
_The hell was this?! _

_He moved forward, Igneel lying on the ground seemed so close, but it took more than a few steps for Natsu to reach him; his hands resting on the scales of his father._

_"That… Igneel? Why- this already-" Something told him it had happened, and he knew that. But it still felt like he was relieving it, and his eyes felt glassy but they were too dry. _

_Nothing allowed to happen._

_Even as he touched Igneel, he couldn't actually feel him; his knees dropping into the puddle of blood that seemed deeper than only moments ago._

_Why couldn't he feel him?! _

_The dragon was right here, under his finger tips.._  
_He glanced back quickly, looking around, Most things were hard to see, like he knew they were there but they didn't have an actual form. Like when you remembered something but only remembered a few things that happened in it._  
_There was one thing however, that he recognised in seconds. He wasn't sure if it was a memory or not, since this he could swear he had never seen. _

_He turned his attention back to Igneel, who was suddenly no longer there._  
_Natsu let his hands drop, confusion settling. He hadn't felt Igneel leave, but then again…_

_"Natsu."_

_The voice was calm, considerate but also a little condescending._

_He struggled to turn, the blood had heightened considerably, and now they seemed to be walking in something much deeper than a puddle._

_"Lucy… Igneel was…"_

_"I know."_

_He glanced up at her, as she stood only moments away from him, her hair long and blonde. Not like back then, she was dressed in her usual attire at Fairy Tail and yet she looked like she did these days._

_"But he's gone, Natsu." She continued, her voice ominous as he realised she looked unusually blank. _

_Igneel was gone. _

_What made him think anything could change that… _

_Just hearing Lucy say it, made him realise how true it was._

_"You didn't save him… How could you do that?" She whispered, finally her expression changing to something so hurtful. She looked to be in pain, pain that he had not managed to do a thing._

_"And then you left me? You left the guild? How could you.." _

_She dropped her head, her lip quivering as he brown eyes forced themselves to stay open._

_"You know why, Luce…" He replied, rising to his feet and his hands pulled her forward._

_But she yanked back, looking hurt and cross, wanting to stay away from his touch._

_"WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?" _

_"Hey-" Natsu simply blinked, her voice like a whip as it came out so rough._

_"DO YOU NOT THINK OF OTHERS? NOT THINK OF ME? YOU KNOW WHAT IT WAS LIKE NOT TO HAVE YOU HERE?!"_

_He stammered back, not replying. What was he supposed to say…_

_"I- I thought you were gone f-forever… I didn't think you were ever going to come back to me… why would you do that?"_

"Pssst."

Natsu didn't even bother to tilt his head at the voice as he was suddenly dragged out from his pointless and messy dream, he could hear Lucy breathing in and out gently so it was obvious she was fast asleep.

"What?" He replied quietly.

"Aye… You were moving around …"

"Sorry Happy.. didn't mean to wake ya." He moved his hand the ruffle the cat's blue head.

"Aye… It's okay… What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

The boy leaned back in the grass he lay upon, his eyes glued to the stars in the sky. It didn't feel like long that he was back in Lucy's apartment; smelling her scent for the last time. He had left her...

And now they were both back after a year, searching for the guild that had unclearly disbanded. In all honesty, he'd always thought that Fairy Tail would not even consider such a thing.

Let alone allow it to play out… people scattered here and there and Lucy all alone.

The chunk of regret that settled in Natsu's gut had him only thinking of one thing. If he hadn't left, he could have punched sense into everyone that went their own ways from Magnolia. Though most of the regret was because of himself.

With a grumble he rolled over, his eyes heavy from lack of sleep.

Though even in the darkness, he could see Lucy curled up on his now-unpacked duffel.

They had only taken rest because it had begun to grow dark and the walk was taking longer than they expected; but he was still surprised she settled down to sleep without one speck of a complaint.

Not that it was a bad thing, but he expected at least something from her. Perhaps she was just really tired.

She did look relaxed after all, her blonde locks across her shoulders as she too lay on her side, her arms tucked around her face so that all Natsu could see clearly was her long eyelashes.

"Aye. Just try and sleep. You look tired." Was all Happy replied, curing up by Natsu's feet with a worried expression. It didn't take the exceed two moments to fall asleep as well.

Natsu sighed a little, his head busy and yet all he could focus on was Lucy's hair.

After a while it wasn't long till he kept loosing track of the minutes that he watched Lucy; not being able to shake out the anger and hurt in her eyes.

How could he sleep... when all he could think of was that.


	5. Don't Leave

His eyes scanned down at the paper in an excited manner, requests for certain wizards were rare and so it wasn't often that one fell into the hands of the dragon slayer so quickly. But the fact that it had outline he come alone to complete the job seemed to have caused caution to rise from his blonde haired best friend.

Personally, he didn't see the concern, he was powerful after and if a job asked for him specifically then it would be something he could do alone. Why bother hiring a mage that couldn't fulfil the job with ease? Natsu was sure that it would be a piece of cake.

"Luce, it's fine. Look there's not even a train to take! I can walk the bridge."

"It's not the train I'm worried about, Natsu-"

"You shouldn't be worried at all! This job'll be easy; look it says so right there-" He dangled the paper in front of her as proof.

"Yes, but why do you have to go alone?"

"They only want me, they probably don't want to pay anyone else."

"That makes no sense, Natsu. What if it's a trap?"

He chuckled at her tone slightly, he wasn't sure if she was telling him or simply questioning the matter; but he was certain he could take care of himself. she had no reason to worry.

Besides, if the mission did end up turning out to be a little dangerous, at least Lucy and Happy would be out of the crossfire.

"If it's a trap, then I'll come right back, how does that sound?"

"Will you come back?"

He practically froze at her words, her expression had softened so much that it made his stomach ache. All he felt was guilt as she watched him, almost begging.

With a rather forced laugh, he subconsciously vowed to return her smile.  
"Of course!" He replied cheerfully, hoping she wouldn't notice; pivoting on his left foot.

Though something yanked him back and his act momentarily slipped as he turned to look back at the blonde with the utmost sorrowful expression; her brown eyes trained on him with determination.

"Please, don't leave."


	6. Vengeance

It didn't take long to realise the injured had taken cover, and Natsu wasn't in exactly the sweetest of moods. No matter how distraught their guild was, every member he would protect with his heart and soul.

With an urgent movement, he practically ripped open the tent entrance; each person having their own- at least each injured person. This town was used to illnesses and injuries after all; being down west meant it was further away from Fiore and people here were expected to have their own forms of healing.

And fairy tail would have too if Wendy wasn't down for the count.

He flared up again, his fists clenched; all of them had wished that Wendy really could heal herself. Alas, she had to heal the slow way and that meant that everyone else had to aswell.

Finally, he let those dark olive eyes of his drag through the murkiness of the tent; it wasn't exactly cosy, it was small and there was only one person lying on a mat; her head resting back on a pillow as she looked pale. If it weren't anyone else, maybe his heart wouldn't sink so much; cuz he sure as hell hadn't seen Gray around and this injured Mage was supposed to be with him.

"Juvia?!" He gasped, a little more shocked than he had meant to; but honestly he would have thought she would still be out there; or with Gray by her side for his battle- in defeat or not. He hoped that this didn't mean Gray was in one of these tents too...

"Natsu-San..." She whispered, wiping her head. She was ill looking and Natsu could only assume that she had been injured badly; something that was messing with her functions to make her look so sore.

"What the hell happened? Where's Gray?"

"G-gray-sama…"

Her eyes welled up with tears, a sorrow look on her face.

"Juvia does not know… when Juvia awoke… she was in here…"

Natsu gritted his teeth; his pink locks trickling over his forehead as his anger began to grow, fairly furious with the fact that his nakama was lying before him in tears. In his books, that was an excuse for vengeance enough.

"You were fighting?"

The blue mage nodded gently, the back of her head slow in movements as she clearly looked uncomfortable.

"Juvia did not see; Juvia was weak to have not known."

"You should have turned to water…"

"Juvia was low on magic, Gray-Sama and Juvia had been fighting for hours…" Bringing a hand up; she wiped her eyes and only then did Natsu realised he had sunk to his knees.

"Those bastards…"

"Natsu-San… should also be checked…" She pointed lightly to his head and he already knew it was sticky with blood. They had all been fighting their own battles, so mana was low.

"It's okay… I should find Gray-" He pushed himself back onto his feet, "Where were you fighting?"

"Juvia really thinks it would be best…"

Natsu cracked his knuckles, his irritation high, he wasn't in the mood to be told what to do; he had to find Gray and kick these people's asses…

Moving, he went to step back, though something stopped him and he realised the back of his coat was being pulled.

"Natsu-San…"

"Let go! You want me to find Gray or not?!"

"Natsu-San should also rest-"

"I DON'T HAVE TIME-"

"You're angry, and tired… Juvia can tell…"

"Who the hell side you on?!" He barked, not meaning it in quite the angry way, but he was frustrated. He couldn't believe these bastards were getting away with this. Attacking was one thing, but they were now purposely singling the guild up, making them end up so injured… His Guild, his family… he couldn't rest when something had to be done; bloody head or not.

"Juvia can't let Natsu-san go, not when you're like this."


	7. Happy

"Natsu?"

He didn't move at all as her hand touched his back, a concerned expression sitting on her pale face. It was difficult with him being so silent, she wasn't sure how to comfort someone who was usually always so optimistic.

Seeing him this way… what was she supposed to do?

She knew what it was like to sit and wait, but it was even worse being told that nothing could be done, and even now as she stood behind him, them in the open field with nothing but sheets of paper and glum looks on their faces.

Lucy shuffled herself around, tucking her skirt behind her legs so that she could take a seat beside the boy, his knees up to his head as he folded his arms to cover his face.

He hadn't spoken a word since the news, and that silence made Lucy more sick to her stomach. What was she supposed to say?

If she were in his position she would hide herself away, tuck herself deep into the darkness of her room and sob. But Natsu was such an open person, always put on a brave face. But when they had found out the news, he had closed himself off in a different way.

It was obvious just by the way he held himself, there was something so special about the boy that he could express himself by simply the was he breathed.

It was like his mind had shut down, his expression read less and Lucy just wanted to pull him into a hug or tell him that everything was okay, but the fact was, she couldn't do that at all.

"Natsu." She repeated, tilting her head as she sniffed a little. If only he said something, showed her that he still had the ability to reply. Anything. He was usually the one telling her that everything would be okay, the one she relied on, and surely enough; the fact that she couldn't give him the same in return made her feel twice as bad. That's why she had to try so hard to keep it together, not to allow herself to break down into tears. She wanted to give Natsu a chance to do that himself first, but she was getting nothing.

"Natsu… please talk to me…"

She sighed a little bit, so used to dealing with losses on her own. But this one was not truly hers to bear, it was his.

She heard him sigh, it was hard not to, there was noting else but the sound of the gentle breeze that afternoon.

She extended her hand at that, reaching out for the pink haired mage once again.

"Nat-"

"Lucy."

Her hand came to a stop immediately, the hesitation causing her to pull back along with the new tone of his voice. She had almost forgotten what it sounded like, it had felt so long since he had opened his mouth.

Lucy's eyes widened, leaning back where she sat so that she could focus all of her attention onto him now. She intended to try her best, anything to help. She understood far too well.

"I know it's hard but-"

"Don't."

"Natsu, you need to-"

"Please." He uncurled a little at that, his expression gentle, helpless. His face was pale and his eyes looking like he was ready to cry but something was forcing him not to allow that to happen. It almost hurt how strong he was being, it was okay for him to cry, she wanted to so much as well.. but first she knew she had to understand first.

"I just want to know how you're feeling…"

"We can fix it."

"Fix it?"

"Yes, there's always a way around it, we just need to…"

"Natsu. We can't. You heard what the results said."

He glanced up at her with that, his eyes wide, trembling.

"You're giving up."

"I'm not…" She whispered, glancing down at the grass, not wanting to keep her eyes with his, there was a heavy sadness lingering in his eyes, and it made her want to break.

"Then why don't you…"

"There's always a time Natsu, we live and we die… there's nothing good about it.. I know… and it's not fair but…" She let her eyes drift back up, and his eyes were glued to the grass as his eyes looked watery, frozen in thought.

"He's sick. He won't get better… and us… we have to…" She shook her head a little, her eyes welling up too, it was hard.. how was she supposed to explain it. He knew how it worked, he had lost people before, Igneel was a prime example. But this had been a part of him too, another part of him that was sentenced to leave.

He ran a hand over his face, his head dropping back into his hands as he stretched out his legs in a stressful manner.

"I can't…"

He shook his head and looked down again, she felt a warm droplet fall on her arm.

"I can't just… watch Happy die."

"You won't…" She leaned forward gently, pulling his hand away from his face so that she could force him to look at her. "We will watch him live, and live with him till the very last moment."


	8. Dampened Fury

Tears

B) thanks to the-dragonslayer-natsu

"You can't."

"I've gotten stronger, you've seen it with your own two eyes. And besides I've got my celestial spirits; they can protect me."

"Let me come with you-"

"No! No, this is something I need to do on my own."

"Why?"

"Why can't you understand that?!"

It wasn't like they had planned this conversation to end this way, but Lucy was furious; and Natsu didn't have to use his senses to figure it out. It was easy by the way her cheeks puffed up in the dim lights outside her house; the moon the only source of luminance against the tense situation that had flared up. Natsu was trying his hardest not to raise his own voice, but this mission they had taken on together. Lucy didn't have any right to simply kick him out, especially when her idea was so reckless.

"So you think you got it all planned?" He snapped, a little louder than he had intended. This was Lucy, he was trying to convince her not push her away after all; usually she was quite easy, but when she thought she was right, a stubbornness always protruded out from her.

"Yes, I know what to do; if you would just listen.."

"Yeah, I got it, you want to use yourself as bait."

"We've used this technique before, even at your request-"

"This is when I was there too, Lucy."

"I can take care of myself! I've been training too you know, you're not the only one that improved!" She was irritated, barking her replies at him, her cheeks rosy and her expression irritated; he couldn't help but feel a little hurt that she was aiming her hostility at her. But lately she always seemed so worried about them splitting up, or doing dangerous things alone, why was it so hard for her to understand that he was worried? But of course, words weren't his expertise, and simply expressing his concern was surely not enough to stop her from rushing ahead.

He frowned quickly, her own body stance was opposite him, her fists in balls as she glared up at him, telling him she meant business.

"And what then huh? What are you going to do after they catch you?"

"I don't know yet! Don't you trust me? Why do you think I'm just going to fail, do you really not believe in me?"

"Why do I have to explain that I just don't want you going by yourself?!"

"Because! Because you-" She glanced away slightly, and he thought he spotted a twinkle in her eye, perhaps it was a tear; he wasn't quite certain, for when she looked back at him, she looked twice as angry as she did before.

"I can do this, Natsu. I don't need your help."

"I'm not saying you need my help, but we're a team and we took this job together."

"That was before we knew that it concerned my Mother."

"But we don't even know if these people really knew her!"

"NATSU, WHY CAN'T YOU JUST UNDERSTAND THAT I NEED TO DO THIS ALONE?"

"BECAUSE YOU CAN'T DO THIS ALONE!" His own voice raised now, Natsu bared his teeth. He knew what it was like, to want to follow it through. If it were back when he was looking for Igneel, his decision to go alone would have held no questions. But a lot of things had happened since then, and times were different. Sure, Lucy was strong enough physically, but if it concerned her mother; Natsu knew full well that truths and answers could cause more harm than he wished. She needed someone, just in case. Besides, it would be better if they went as a group, the job would get done quicker and she'd have back up if she needed it. Her being like this only made him want to go with her even more rather than let him be okay with it.

"WHY NOT?!"

"BECAUSE I GET IT LUCY. I GET YOU WANT TO GO ALONE, But you can't, you just can't-"

"Yes I can! You think I wasn't worried sick when you left?"

"Lucy-"

"No! I wish I hadn't even told you. I should have just left."

"I never-"

"I've had enough! I'm not weak! I know what I'm doing. And if you can't-" He eyes were welling up, along with the dark clouds in the sky. It was about time that it would begin to rain, but for now, the only salty liquid that fell was from Lucy's eyes.

"I HAVE to do this. I wasn't asking your permission."

"Lucy, I'm just worried…"

"Worried? You're one to talk! You don't give a damn! If you were worried you would let me do this!" She growled slightly, agitated; but he didn't move. Not one spot, he stood there rigid as raindrops finally began falling from the sky in a sorrowful manner; reflecting both their current states in less than a second. He wanted to express how he felt, but even his body wouldn't explain it for him. Lucy was angry, he knew that. She had a right to be, this was something she deserved and he believed in her strength; even now as he looked at her; the rain dampening her passionate angered expression, her eyes staring at him with nothing but determination to win this argument, he knew that she could do it. But the gut wrenching through of him not being by her side if something went wrong, he wouldn't forgive himself.

Their eyes were connected for a long time, focused on one another as no one dared to speak; both of them holding their breath waiting for the other to toss up another comeback.

He frowned, frozen slightly. Their argument couldn't just end like this.. dammit, why wasn't he saying anything? He blanked his mind for a moment, a nervous feel wandering in his gut; his thoughts moving from everything to nothing.

Finally, the dragon slayer pulled her hand so that she was forced to look at him in a confused manner, but he still didn't speak; he had nothing to say after all. Actions spoke louder than words; and he pulled her towards him so that he could give her the most delicate and gentle kiss; he could taste the salty tears on her lips, but it felt right and something flickered inside.

It was the crackle of thunder that seemed to flick Lucy into realising what was happening, the pound of her heartbeat beginning to pick up in pace as the rain began to slam harder down onto them; their mouths lip locked as Lucy finally gained the courage to push back her lips in an angry manner.

Perhaps he was surprised, but he felt himself strengthen his own mouth against her as the rain trickled down her face; and she pulled back gently; her face resting near his collar bone.

"Why did you do that…" She muttered, her breathing heavy as he still held onto her wrist; the rain streaming down his face as he felt her tremble.

"Because it was the only way I could explain why."

"Why you don't want me to go?"

"Why I'm worried."


	9. Care

"Ngh…" Natsu frowned, his head leaning forward, his eyes facing the ground as he was strewn over something. No… not something, someone. His body was rested against someone's leg and he could practically feel them trembling even on solid ground. It took him a moment for his vision to properly come into play and all the other senses began to pour in simultaneously. His mouth tasted like blood, and he could hear a soft breathing from the body he lay on. All he could smell was earth, and he knew well enough the location once he could remember the building had collapsed.

"It's okay…" He heard her whisper, her fingers raking through Natsu's pink hair, "I got you…" Even though her tone was nervous it seemed that she believed her words.

"Lucy?"

"N-Natsu… good, you're awake… please. Stay awake." She said, a little stronger this time and Natsu just watched the ground as he listened to her voice. He thought of sitting up, but he couldn't really find the brain energy to tell his body to do that, and he wasn't really sure why he was lying on her propped up like this. He didn't remember passing out but it was the only explanation for it since the last thing he had remembered was falling.

"What happened?" He said, his voice coming out gargled as he had to spit a sticky red substance from his mouth first in order for his words to make sense.

He heard her stutter a breath at his action, but continued to fiddle with the back of her hair as her voice rose to speak once more.

"The building collapsed and we fell but… you landed funny and you're hurt your head…" Her voice grew quieter as she continued to speak, her concern heavy in her tone. He could feel it now, the fingers on the back of his head, delicately dancing around his scalp. Perhaps something had lodged itself in the back of his skull, he wasn't sure- it felt like something was there.

"Oh…" He blinked, taking in a shaky breath so he could assess his condition closer, focusing. His head hurt for sure, but maybe it was like something was pushing down on the back of him rather than something sticking into his scalp. Or maybe it was something pushing him down, he wasn't exactly sure how heavy the injury was nor what it looked like from Lucy's position; he just knew it was taking a lot of his energy right now to focus on breathing because a wave of fatigue seemed to wash over him. Maybe he had a concussion rather than something stuck in his head, that would make sense for the way that dizziness was taking over his brain waves. Not that such a thing seemed to strike him so well, usually he did fine with such things, he wasn't sure why he felt so different this time.

"It's okay, I'm just pulling away the shards…"

"Huh?"

"You're bleeding a lot…"

Why were her words sounding so fuzzy? He felt so calm despite what she was telling him and the sound of her voice was usually one he would cringe at hearing.

"I keep bandages in my bag, so I'm just trying to clean it up before covering…" Lucy continued, and he could feel her hands raking though his rose pink hair again.

"Okay…" Was all he replied, his eyes heavy from the fatigue that was settling in. But there was a part of his brain that was demanding he move but it was being ignored along with the hum that had began to vibrate in his ears.

"Just don't fall asleep."

"Mh.."

"Please, Natsu."

He nodded against her body, still relaxed over her as she inspected his head.

"Then what…"

"Just keep talking to me, You'll be okay. Let me treat your wound."


	10. Coming Home

"Natsu…?" Lucy almost fell over with the speed she had bounced forward towards the front door with, she couldn't believe what she was looking at, Natsu cursing beneath his breath as he limped through the doorway with a pale face.

"What the…" Her eyes dragged down to observe his leg, a bandaged bloody stain around his thigh, it looked deep. Though it seemed that didn't stop him from taking another step forward into her home and no doubt about it that he had taken a long walk back to get here in the first place. Certainly not a good choice for such a wound, you could already tell from his features that it hurt to stand on. She knew how Natsu was but still couldn't help questioning why he didn't just rest. He could have visited Lucy after getting whatever was wrong with his leg cleaned up.

Just then she noticed that he too was scrutinising her, and she straightened up in order to give him a serious look.

"Don't move another step."

"Eh?" The pink haired mage glanced at the door frame that he still had his hand gripped on.

"Where is Happy?"

"Went back to Guild."

"Why didn't you go back there?"

"Said I'd get you first!"

"Did you walk the whole way?"

"Why you ask that?"

"Did you?"

"Nah agh… Happy carried me some way."

She gritted her teeth, his words seemed slurred but in a way that he simply sounded tired. No doubt he was tired anyway, but if this wound on his leg was worse than he was putting on, she surely had to get him to first aid or a doctor. Then again, he also seemed to reply fine, his mood seemed usual. He could be totally fine. She wasn't sure who to trust… herself or him.

Lucy pressed her lips together, her brown eyes focusing on him as she stepped towards him in her morning robes, folding her arms over the silk covering her chest.

"What did you do?"

He raised his brows, relaxing slightly in the doorway as if taking her question as a hint that he might be standing there a while. Though she made sure to take notice of how he positioned his leg, he let it rest and it seemed his expression calmed.

"Do? You mean on the job?"

"I mean to your leg. Why are you limping?"

"How do you even know I was limping…?" He pouted, repositioning his body so he was standing less lopsided.

She laughed humourlessly, this morning she was up for no shit.

"I saw. When you were swearing at my front door. I thought you'd broken something at first."

"Oh.."

"What did you do to your leg?" She lessened her tone, knowing going all Erza voice on him was not going to get the story out of him any quicker, if anything, her irritated tone usually drove him into silence.

"It's not much! Just fighting. Building collapsed. The usual."

"Usual for you… and what… you fell?"

"Just some debris hit me, that's all. Can I come inside now?"

She squinted at him, suspicious. Debris alone wouldn't make a person limp, unless it was one heavy, large piece of debris. Even then, was that considered debris at a larger size?

"Only if you show me."

"Show you what?"

"Your leg!" She barked, that paranoia building up as if she was starting to grow worried.

"Oh… Yeah okay." Natsu pressed his lips together and looked at her blankly. Then brushing his hand across his cheek, he stood up straight and stepped forward with his bad leg. Though his movement was steady, Lucy couldn't help but push herself beside him to aid his walk. The pink mage seemed thankful for her efforts and they both made their way to her dining table at a slow pace. Lucy helped him sit in a delicate manner, and he sighed in relief. He was hot, not his usual temperature but more of a sticky hot. She knew it would feel uncomfortable to even Natsu.

That suspicion was starting to bury itself into the back of her neck and send chills down her spine.

"Do you mind if I take the bandage away?" Voice soft, she moved around Natsu who now sat facing her on a dining table chair, his bad leg having easy access to asses.

"Alright."

Moving down onto her knees, Lucy shuffled forward to unravel the dirty cloth, it practically the colour red from tip to tip. There was quite a lot of it tied around his though, so it was surprising the blood managed to spread that far. Finally it began to peel away and she was left with a torn pair of pants and a fresh looking puncture. She had hoped it would have been smaller, but the wound was as big as her palm, it caving in darker, a fleshy mess like something had buried into it and then been roughly pulled out.

"N-Natsu… what on earth…" She felt her breathing pick up, for this wound would have bled a lot, and it would explain why Natsu was so pale.

"I told you debris.."

"What kind?"

"Like… barbed wire? I dunno, we were still fighting when it fell."

"Wire? Looks like it went in lengthways…" Her fingers hovered over his sore looking wound, them trembling with fear at what she was looking at. "We need to get you to a doctor… no… the hospital-" She flicked her head up at him, her eyes wide. "You're still losing blood because it's still bleeding… we… we need to get you out of here now before you start getting worse-"

Lucy practically jumped to her feet, roughly yanking the fire mage up onto his feet only to hear him yelp.

"Sorry- We- we need to.. WHY DIDN'T YOU GET THIS CHECKED?!" She screamed all of a sudden, those brown eyes heavy with tears that had now formed, the pit of her stomach growing heavy. Natsu however, was watching Lucy with wide eyes, surprised as he watched her explode at him.

"L-Luce- You're freaking me out, please calm down…"

"Calm down? Have you seen how deep this is? Can't you feel how much it hurts?! You're LIMPING."

"I didn't think about it-"

"Of course you didn't! You never do! You're so reckless, the only thing you think about is the fight!"

He frowned quickly, slowly growing offended at her scolding, his mouth opening to defend.

"If I didn't, I could be dead right now-"

"You could be dead RIGHT NOW! Don't you get it?! You lose more blood and you'll end up dying!"

"Then we-"

"We have to leave right now-"

"Just give m-"

"I can't live without you! Don't you get it?!"

"Lucy…"

She felt her robe being tugged, Natsu holding the silk in his fingers as he looked up at her face in a serious manner. She couldn't help but let a tear trickle down her face.

"I get it.."


	11. Let Me In

A mirror, his eyes dull and tired.

_I can save you._

He felt cold to the point where it was growing uncomfortable, being on Lucy lockdown was only temporary so that he wouldn't use up too much magic, but he was started to quickly grow bored of not even using a gentle attack on someone in a spar.

He blinked.

_Save them._

A black abyss, nothing but a never-ending scope of pitch dark as Natsu took a step forward. He was wearing nothing but his white pants, swishing through what he had began to walk in; the liquid rippling beneath as he strode forward slowly- his eyes widening.

_Let me in._

Those white pants were no longer a shade of innocence, for now they had been drenched in blood, his eyes watching his reflection; his face demonic and cruel.

_Will it save them?_

He stared as his hand moved up to touch his face, scales lining his jaw and patterned up to his hairline.

_Yes, just let me in._

His eyes were red in the blood beneath and he felt himself shake.

That's when something twisted in his chest, it felt like he was being stabbed with a wooden stake, the splinters dispersing in his body only to further spread and sharpen. Natsu yelled out, clutching at his face as he fell down to his knees, the blood splashing at his face. It was like something was spreading itself through his chest, making him bleed internally and scream with agony.

_Yes._

There was a thud, someone landing beside him; their breathing heavy.

Natsu wasn't sure what he had been dreaming of, not entirely; he felt dazed as the artificial light of wherever he was blinded him. The last thing he had remembered was looking into a reflection of himself, but what looked back at him was a killer. A cold blooded demon. Because that's what he was now right… END?

Though it wasn't the dream that had woken him, something was pulling harshly down on his arms; pushing them away from his face.

Where was he?

The bathroom?

The floor was cold like tiles, and his face was sticky; he vaguely remembered washing his face.

"N-Natsu?"

That was right, it was late but he couldn't bring himself to sleep. Something had been bothering him. Something nagging at him along with that gentle ache in his chest like he had been bruised.

"Natsu."

The voice was a little louder this time, as if wanting Natsu to respond to his own name.

But he was still sidetracked, trying to retrace old steps as to how he had ended up on the floor.

Lucy had fallen asleep, and the last time he had glanced at the clock it had been approximately 3am. Maybe he'd fallen asleep too. He didn't feel well rested, so he could only assume he had suffered a nightmare.

The fire mage blinked, his eyes opening wide enough that he could see the floor; those clean blue tiles beneath him; and those white pants now white again. He took in a shaky breath. His heart was beating a million miles a minute, he felt wrong somehow.

"Natsu, look at me?"

She was still holding his hands, pulling them apart.

"What's all this blood?…" Her voice was trembling and he finally dragged his head upright to look at her; Lucy's blonde hair was trickled over her shoulder, her head bowed as she caressed at Natsu's hands.

He too glanced down to see his hands, his fingertips wet with blood.

"Natsu, how hard were you doing that?!"

He frowned, unsure what she was talking about; blinking as he realised his wet face was not from water, but from the mess on his hands.

"I think I fell asleep…"

"No, you didn't." Her brown eyes focused on him and he was forced to meet them; she looked tired and his head was starting to spin but he blinked again, straining.

"Well then.."

"You were awake, your eyes were open…"

"How'd I get blood on my hands…"

"Y-you… when I came in it looked like you were scratching your eyes.. no… more like… clawing at them…"

He blinked again, moving his hand slightly but Lucy was clamping them down like she didn't trust him for the moment.

"Were you hallucinating or something?"

He shook his head, "It felt like a dream…"

"You're tired Natsu… you look awful…" She sobbed slightly, "Oh your eyes… you made them all red…"

He blinked again, nodding; the blonde leaning forward so that her forehead touched his.

"Whatever it was you'll be okay. Okay?"

"Okay…"

"You've just got to let me in."

_I don't think there's enough room for three, Natsu._


	12. Nightmare

"It's fine Lucy, all we need to do is kick their asses. Simple stuff right?"

"You talk like it's going to be easy."

A small grin tugged at his lips, "Who do you think I am, Luce?"

Lucy's own mouth curled up into a warm smile; watching him cautiously. He wasn't sure what she was thinking about, but he felt content as he felt her hand gently find his fingertips and squeeze on them.

"Then let's do it together."

Natsu moved forward, looking ahead as he felt himself searching for a spot to shoot. He would attack in a timely manner and hit the enemy head on. He didn't need to think it through, he just knew he would hit and everything would be perfect. Besides Lucy was right here, there was nothing they couldn't do.

Bubbling up, he let his magic course through his veins, it breaching further; the flames licking up and around Lucy whom he never asked to step away.

A ticking sound.

He wasn't sure what it was from, he just knew it made his gut ache. Like it was a clock counting down to something he was unsure of.

He knew she was setting alight.

She turned to look at him, her eyes dull, her face changing into a frown as she realised she was hurting.

He was hurting too.

Hurting to watch her.

But as he continued to grow concerned, him magic only seemed to strengthen with his emotions.

Along with him as he let the fire consume the two of them.

At first he didn't realise, then he noticed that it wasn't usual of his magic to do such a thing.

That was until he felt a yell fall from his mouth, his scream feeling like it came from another place.

But there was no way it was from somewhere else, that scream had certainly came from himself.

A flash of light.

It came from beyond the curtains.

A ray of sunshine blinding him as he struggled to locate his surroundings.

Someone was shaking him, trying to wake him quicker.

He let his eyes rummage through the silhouettes of the bedroom, the mahogany bookshelf at the back of the room, the desk with paper upon paper, and a girl leaning over him.

Her hair blonde, long; toppling over her shoulder like a waterfall that was having a hard time flowing in one direction as she moved back and forth his eyesight.

"Natsu!"

She'd been talking to him, only now could he understand her words.

If there was one thing Natsu couldn't remember doing, it had been falling asleep.

The boy practically swung up like he'd rather be doing anything but stay in the position he had been cooped up in; his body was damp with what felt like sweat and his heart was beating a million miles a minute.

He'd remembered just a feeling, nothing visual; just the pain of whatever his dreams had conjured up. He'd remembered just a feeling, nothing visual at the moment; just the pain of whatever his dreams had conjured up.

Looking up in the dark, he spotted Lucy's face, and he blinked trying to push away the images of her burning alive out of his brain.

A quick flick of his head, Lucy's apartment. He had been sleeping on the couch, but he was now lying on her wooden floor; the air clammy.

"Are you okay?" She whispered, honestly concerned.

Her eyes, check her eyes.

He did as his brain commanded, yanking at her arm as she yelped in surprise, their eyes meeting one another.

Natsu could feel her hold her breath for a moment, those warm brown eyes clear in the darkness..

"Natsu…"

He pressed his lips together, before giving her a look over cautiously. She seemed fine. But he couldn't shake off what he had just watched.

"Will you answer me?"

She was in pain, she had been hurting and it was all because he had been careless. Imagine if that had happened…

He let go of her arm quickly, and she flicked her eyes to look at his hand in worry.

He let his fingers tug at his scarf and Lucy leaned forward to pull it around the right way.

"When did I fall asleep?" Was the only words that toppled from his lips.

She grimaced, unsatisfied with his lack of a response, sinking to her knees beside him.

"I was scared you wouldn't wake up."

"How long was I asleep?"

"You'd collapsed…" She mumbled, her lip trembling.

"Really?"

"Natsu. What's happening?"

"I don't…"

"When's the last time you slept?"

"What?"

"You're not sleeping… because of the nightmares right?"

"How did you…" He pushed himself further upright, readjusting his scarf a second time.

"You were muttering. It looked like it was hurting you." She said sadly, observing his face.

"I…"

"Why didn't you tell me? I could have tried to help…"

He glanced down at the floor. How could he tell her that his nightmares consisted of him burning her alive?


	13. Night Visitor

"Luce…"

It was a warm whisper in the night, especially since the voice came from a certain popular visitor at the apartment of Lucy Heartfilia.

"Pssst…. Lucy…" He prodded at the blonde slightly; not bothering to ease hid force as his finger poked her rosy, sleepy cheeks; a frown plastered on her face as he disturbed her slumber. The blonde hugged her pillow, drool trickling from her mouth as she rested all too peacefully; the dragon slayer couldn't help but let a snigger escape his lips.

"Shut up…" She grumbled, her tongue escaping to clean up her self created mess.

"Luce!" Natsu dared to speak a little louder, tilting his head another inch closer; he could practically smell her. Though his proximity was the thing that woke her, those brown eyes flicking open quicker than a venus flytrap; and her leg swinging out to pelt the pink haired male smack bang in the chest. The boy toppled backwards, all his defences down as he fell onto her rug, watching in awe as she flicked upright.

"Hey!" She barked half heartedly.

"Ow!"

"I was asleep!"

"Yeah, I know."

"What do you want? I told you already that you could stay on the couch."

"I know." He replied, sitting up on the carpet so that his legs were crossed. He wasn't sure how clearly she could see him, but with his general heightened vision; he watched her expression turn irritated. She was not impressed to have been woken up. Perhaps she had already guessed from the darkness beyond her curtains that it wasn't even three in the morning yet.

"You're the one that went back home." She grunted, yanking the bedsheets and pulling them over her head slightly, the action clear that she wanted to be left alone rather than to keep her warm.

"I know."

It was the third time he'd said it now, he wasn't really sure what else to say. She had offered for him to sleep here, but she would have expected him to sleep.

She hesitated at his repetition, a graceful sigh filling the unwanted silence. Retracting the blanket, Lucy uncurled herself from the warmth; leaning across her bed in order to flick the bedside lamp on.

Expecting the light, even Natsu squinted as the brightness of the room increased, his eyes settling on the sleepy blonde. He briefly looked over her attire, she wore a silk nightdress he didn't recognise and those blonde locks were pulled into a messy braid.

Even tired and grumpy, Lucy managed to look like her well-done up normal self.

"Are you hungry or something?" She forced her tone gentle, rubbing her eyes to look at him properly.

"No, I just thought I'd come back."

"Yes, but why Natsu? It's late."

A quick smile perked onto his mouth, "Just checking if you were asleep. I didn't know you liked to slobber everywhere."

"I don't slobber, thank you very much!" In an instant, her eyebrows furrowed in offence and he felt his own expression soften, eyes falling to the ground. He hadn't come here to wind her up after all.

He could feel her eyes watching him before she spoke once more, her voice a new kind of eloquence.

"Natsu, what's the matter?"

He blinked, flicking his eyes back onto her, she looked concerned. Something about that look made him feel protective. But when the concern was for him, he felt like there was no need for it.

"Nothing, I just came back. Stay with you."

"You told me earlier you wanted to go home."

"I know, I changed my mind."

"And didn't tell Happy about it?"

"Ah.."

"I know he'd be here too if he did. Wouldn't miss out on waking me up after all!" She waved her arms to gesture such an assumption, her fingertips holding up her chin.

He fell silent, looking every but at her eyes, before finally settling them to watch her hand. He felt more at ease in her home, he hadn't realised that until now.

"Natsu… When's the last time you slept?"

"What?"

"You look exhausted."

"No, I'm fine-"

"Natsu."

His green eyes moved up once more to meet hers, pressing his lips together; frustrated. He may be good at keeping his thoughts to himself, even hiding secrets, wounds, heck even weapons! But if there was one thing Natsu couldn't hide, it was the dark circles under his eyes. He couldn't sleep because all he could think about was the things he had been told. About Zeref, about END, about himself. His dreams were no better, they were like scattered memories that hurt, made him feel sick for days, left him confused and begging for answers. It was irritation that kept him awake, insomnia the one thing that he could have to avoid falling deep into a slumber he could not escape. That of course was a little difficult to explain to Lucy, for she had absolutely no idea about what was swimming inside his brain.

"Natsu? Please… You're scaring me…"


	14. Wreckage

"How many fingers am I holding up?"

There was a ringing, it rather defiant in terms of lingering; even with his vision blurred, he knew the voice belonged to Lucy. He always knew.

"Natsu! How many?!"

He groaned, pulling himself upright, flicking his eyes lazily in her direction. She sounded tired to the point of agitation, but of course she did. They'd literally just endured an explosive. He was the one that should be checking on her. But at the moment his eyes were still blurry and his head felt like it had been ripped apart.

With another push, he tried to focus on Lucy.

"Three… Three, you're holding up three."

She sighed at that, a sound of relief and as if that sigh had triggered it; he felt his eyes focus, clamping a hand on his head.

It was sticky, wet and sore; clearly his metaphorical feeling of a torn head was a little more true than he had anticipated.

"Are you okay?" He asked gently, turning slightly so that he could view the wreckage. Luckily they had been the only ones here, thank goodness Happy wasn't beyond the wreckage. Railings were knocked over, and they were practically in a cave of bricks from the building they had been standing in.

The attack had flown in through the window, they had never expected to walk directly into a trap like that, it almost made Natsu feel sick with how easily they had been fooled.

He looked at Lucy, this time with his vision at full capacity. He had been right about he looking tired, her face was as pale as paper and she looked like she was about to throw up more than anything. Though it seemed she was more concerned about Natsu than anything.

"Your head looks awful Natsu, you need to keep still." She whispered, sat up against a large clump of wreckage.

She sat rather odd, and Natsu was curious as to whether or not she too had been injured.

A wave of pain flooded through the left side of his head and he squeezed his hand tighter. perhaps if he did it hard enough it would stop the fountain of blood from staining his hair.

"I asked if you were okay, did you get hurt bad?" He specified the question this, he was starting to get a bad feeling.

She was curled up too tightly on herself, that unusual way of sitting was abnormal unless she was trying her very hardest to hide something despite the pain.

Not to mention her expression was strained, at first he had put it down to the situation, but it seemed now that it was more a reaction of pain.

"I'm fine, I just shouldn't move just yet."

"Where are you hurt?" He let his sticky hand drop to the floor, debris going to the blood in an instant; but he was using it as a lever to push himself onto is feet.

Lucy's eyes followed him, shaking her head.

"You shouldn't move, a wound that bad probably gave you concussion." The wobble in her voice made Natsu tremble.

"I'm fine, I just want to check on you."

Up on his feet his body shook; the pain from his head shooting through his body like a rocket. He could barely stand straight, she was right. Better move quickly if he intended on checking oer Lucy before he collapsed from standing up.

As if adrenaline decided to take over, he brought himself closer to the blonde girl. She only seemed to hold herself tighter, him dropping down to sit beside her.

"Ugh…"

Now that he was beside her he could clearly see the item sticking out of her back, his eyes widening as he tried his best not to empty the contents of his stomach. An ache in his chest began to develop quickly.

"I told you to stay…"

He dropped his hand onto her arm and tugged at it; Lucy uncurling.

What he saw was no figure of imagination; the was a metal pole buried deep into her ribs; as she opened her legs away from her chest, blood escaped like a dam being opened. The sides of her lips curled up in apology, blood trickling down and out of her mouth to her chin.

"I'm sorry…"

"Y… You are… dying?" He felt something warm fall down his check.

She nodded gently. "And I think you are too."


	15. Wake Up

"See? Right there. She has a gash under her chest..." He said, pointing at her slightly. He had gotten grazes from the fall but Lucy obviously had something worse hit her. His mind reeled to what it might be. It was bad enough he had to carry her the entire time, but he couldn't shake an undying concern away from his chest.

Wendy focused a bit more on her magic and frowned.

"I can heal the wound but...it doesn't seem to be the major cause of this.."

"What? You mean she's got a concussion?"

"Not that. She seems to have...some kind of illness…" The girl let her hands scan more. Natsu had tried to move as quick as he could, but with Lucy as extra luggage he could only run so fast. They had fallen, off… well his memory didn't serve him well. All he could remember was that he had fallen, Lucy right with him.

"Illness? Like poison?"

"No...it's a natural illness… more like… it runs in the family."

"What?" He looked confused, sitting by the bed. They were in the guild he assumed. The infirmary. Though the place seemed hazy. "Like that she would have had all along?"

"Not really but...it was always inside her somehow, just never showed any effects till now.."

His head spun.

Back up… back up…

The two of them had just left on a normal mission… and now Wendy was telling him that his most precious friend had a deadly condition? What was going on?

"Wendy… is it something that can't be fixed?"

Her eyes fell, watching the blonde with her chocolate eyes. He already knew that what she knew was not good news.

"I'm not really sure yet…"

Natsu seemed annoyed that Wendy didn't explain better, but that was fine he supposed… everything would be fine. It would be best to heal her up first then they could ask her herself.

It didn't take long to heal Lucy, and Natsu rejected Wendy's offer of healing his own wounds; though he didn't remember getting any and she left to go grab supplies instead. All he did was watch Lucy.

But that was it… as soon as Wendy left. That was all that seemed to happy, he watched her. And watched her.

It felt like for ever, but the blonde finally stirred, moving her hand to her face as she blinked.

"Where am I..."

He perked up at her voice, it had been a while and he had started falling asleep.

"Lucy! Are you okay?"

"Oh…what…what happened..?" The girl tried to sit up, but Natsu was quick to push her back into the cushions, the light around them seemed to brighten.

"You zoned out, but Wendy fixed up your wound... She said that you might not be real fixed just yet though.." He said, tempted to lean forward and brush back a lock of her hair.

"Eh, what do you mean?

"She said you might be.. Sick or somethin'.." He mumbled, watching her intently.

"Sick.. oh gosh…" She stared at him a little, like a clock ticking away.

Something was wrong there, something about her eyes made his body hurt.

She replaced that with a cross expression. "You didn't let her heal you."

Since his wounds felt like nothing, he hadn't expected her to bring it up.

"Hey, don't change the subject..."

"Why do you always do this..."

"It's not even that bad! Honest, Lucy this is more important. Wendy will be back soon."

She however reached her hand to his arm where a few cuts were.- "But you're still bleeding a bit.."

He glanced to her hand and then back at Lucy, still more concerned for her. "Lucy... Did anyone in your family have an illness? Like a proper one?" He asked, trying to pull her attention back to what he was worrying about.

She swallowed, looking down at his hands.

"Natsu… I didn't want to worry you…"

Wake up…

"I've had it for weeks…"

Wake up…

"There's nothing we can do trust me… I looked into it already…"

You're having a nightmare…

"I don't have very long…"


End file.
